These are the people I hang out with...

[candyland]

Random conversation of Evil--except *gasp* this one was NOT with magic_truth. This was with my friend Matt, who is a dork. Big time. You'll see what I mean. Enjoy the short, random weirdness.



Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
as i paddled down the mighty current of Butsecks Creek...

Matt Smith says:
...i found the water to be rather discolored, in a brown hue...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...and there was a strange odor. It's song was strange, very deep, almost guttural in nature...

Matt Smith says:
...I took a large wiff and them proceeded to lose my lunch...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...all over the person in front of me...

Matt Smith says:
...then jewels got rather mad, as she had to change clothes....

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...and proceeded to lay the smackdown on Matt's ass...

Matt Smith says:
...for no apparent reason....

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...other than the fact that she now smelled like upchuck and had small chunky things in her hair...

Matt Smith says:
...but she felt bad for matt and decided to push lindsey out of the boat for laughing...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...at the last minute, Lindsey grabbed Matt's arm and dragged him down into the muddy waters of Butsecks Creek with her...

Matt Smith says:
...luckily for Matt, he used Lindsey as a floation device, as she heroically gave her life to save Matt...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...who was then eaten by a shark...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...and died...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...pathetically...

Matt Smith says:
...which was strange, considering sharks don't live in rivers. but he did not die in vain, as Jewels created a memorial only to the life of Matt. Linsdey was forgotten, sadly...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...and then a bunch of drunk college students ransacked Matt's monument and sodomized his corpse...

Candyland--Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you says:
...but Lindsey was forgotten, so she was safe...

Matt Smith says:
...and then the story ended...



Note: It ended because Lindsey went too far (yes, I am capable of it). And Matt is a doodoo head. A big one.

Thank you.

PS. I'm in a community called grammar_whores, and if you've got some time to spare, go check out this post. In regards to the person who started this post in the first place: I would like to mourn the death of a universal friend, Common Sense...

Comments

[candy--chan.livejournal.com]

...so Matt saying that nobody cared that I drowned doesn't constitute an extended vacation in the Underworld? How does that work, exactly?

[(Anonymous)]

Is that me going to the Underworld...or you? Cuz I'm pretty sure pulling me overboard and having sharks rip me apart isn't exactly angel-like behavior.

And why you look at me with the man-titty joke? ;)

[candy--chan.livejournal.com]

You just don't understand my genius. As for the man-titty thing...

...*squeeze*

[(Anonymous)]

I feel violated....

[candy--chan.livejournal.com]

Could be worse. I could just be telling you to take off your pants and then stare expectantly *smiles sweetly and points at Jeff*

[(Anonymous)]

That's ok...I wouldn't want to overwhelm you such a sight. I'm not sure you could handle me taking off my pants.

[candy--chan.livejournal.com]

*snort* Right. I'll believe THAT when I see it ^_^