candyland: (ladies)
[personal profile] candyland
I was asked by someone specifically why I hate Valentine's Day. So I figured I'd lay it out here--a week after the fact, but it's getting posted anyway. LJ cut for the sake of your f-lists, and so those of you who don't care don't have to read it.



It's honestly not that I hate Valentine's Day. Granted, it's definitely not my favorite holiday--I'm extremely partial to Christmas--but I don't hate it, per se. I think it's a great idea (in theory, at least) a day for people to express love and/or affection to family, friends, spouses, significant others, etc. That's great. We'll ignore the fact that I'm still fairly disillusioned with the whole romance thing ^_^

However, they've commercialized all the meaning out of the holiday. I seriously think that those jewelry commercials should just say, "Buy her diamonds, or you don't really love her." Candy, cards, flowers...I appreciate that this is supposed to be the "special day" for telling someone you love them...but all the love has been removed from the day by the never-ending hype, and what I perceive to be an emphasis on romantic love. How about platonic love? Familial love? Let's show the less-romantic side of the emotion a little love as well, please.

Secondly, I get really sick of pink, white, and red. And I generally really like pink, too. But it's EVERYWHERE!! Bear in mind that I feel the same way about orange and black at Halloween, and red and green at Christmas. It's nothing personal, it's just overdone.

Finally, and most importantly, my dislike of February fourteenth derives from something that I know a lot of people get really pissed off about. Why, oh why, is it that every freakin' V-Day, at least half a dozen people feel the need to ask me some variant on the following question: "Why don't you have a boyfriend yet?" This is usually the part where I give them a veeeeeeery strained smile and walk away.

It especially irritates me when they feel the need to try and convince me that I'm somehow wrong for being single. One friend told me he thought I should "get a boyfriend," and proceeded to give me this whole long list of reasons why he enjoyed having a significant other. I'm like, "Great. That's you."

And that's another thing that bothers me, when people say to "get" a boyfriend. This isn't exactly a solo sport here. Is there a Boyfriend Boutique somewhere--you go in and say "I want this feature, this feature, and this feature, when can I pick him up?" Honestly, you don't just "get" a boyfriend, there's a bit more to it than that. Like mutual interest, perhaps?

And I really don't believe that the sun rises and sets by whether or not I--or anyone else--is attached or single. I'm twenty years old, and I'm a junior in college. I'm young, I'm busy, and I've got plenty of time to think about the whole "significant other" and "marriage" thing.

It's in the family, too, but surprisingly enough, it's not my parents. My mom teases me a lot about how I need to meet and marry a nice boy from our hometown and live in the house across the street so she can see her grandbabies whenever she wants--nothing about me in this arrangement, of course. But I know she's joking, and here's the reason why I know she actually doesn't want me to think about it yet.

My cousin got married a couple years back, and after the wedding a bunch of people were milling around, chatting before we headed off to the reception dinner. And someone--I can't remember who--came up to me and made a comment to the effect of, "Well, Lindsey, you're the next oldest, so you're next in line. When can we expect a wedding invitation?" My mother jumped from the other side of the room to stand in front of me and say, "Absolutely NOT. She's not even going to think about getting married until after she's graduated from college and gotten a job and an apartment. When she's got her feet under her, then we'll talk." And this woman looked absolutely shocked that I was eighteen years old and not thinking about marriage.

Thank you, Mom. You never let me down, do you? I still have to chuckle at how stunned that woman looked.

But that's really what gets to me the most. There's this huge emphasis on being attached on V-Day. There's so much focus on the romantic love that other love is too often tossed by the wayside. I love my friends. I love my family. Valentine's Day should be a day for love, period.

And I'm sick and tired of people asking me why I'm still single. QUIT ASKING ALREADY. Please! I'd be lying if I said I didn't have the occasional daydream about getting whisked away by a knight in shining armor. Like most other people, I do dream of falling in love someday. But the reality is that I haven't yet. So I'll keep my eyes open. If the Right One happens along, then we'll see what happens. Until then, I'm not going to worry myself about it. Too much else to do right now.

I really don't "hate" the holiday, much as it may sound to the contrary. I'm just extremely cynical about the way it's commercialized something that should be extremely special. If someone offers you a token of affection on February fourteenth, accept it with a smile. Show your friends you love them. But stop assuming that everyone is interested in being attached, and stop rubbing it in the faces of those that aren't. A good chunk of us really couldn't care less.

And yes, I realize that I can also make a lot of these generalizations about other holidays as well. But that, friends, is a story for another day.



[livejournal.com profile] shake_c_ras, there you have my rationale on why I'm just not big on V-Day. But as I was typing this, a really random thought crossed my mind: [livejournal.com profile] spirit_sage_333, you never did succeed with your alleged quest to de-virginize me ♥ *insert Smirk of Evil here*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 07:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
Oh Lordy...I bow down to you two on this one. I've written one lemon in my entire fanfic career--I'd probably stare at the computer going, "Okay, threesome. What are geometric possibilities?" Then I'd be thoroughly distracted...

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 07:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeva-chan.livejournal.com
I've actually only written a few citrisy/lemony fics. >.> A couple of them are written out and waiting to be finished typed up...then rest are under private locks in my LJ waiting to be finished.

And if you have The Scotsman by Dr. Demento, I will love you forever because it would get this really old fic idea out of my head. ♥

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
Just to make sure I've got the right one, is that the song about the girls who find the drunk Scotsman and decide to find out if the story about what they [don't] wear under their kilt is true?

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 07:51 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Hyakkumensou)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
I've written two so far. One yuri lemon that, upon re-read, wasn't as bad as I made it out to be, and Capture. I've got at least three lined up at the moment--The one mentioned above, one for Lurker Day, and a Vampyre AU threesome fic I keep meaning to finish. I've got the pileup down pretty well (Socchan's brief reference notes: Hakuba on top, then Kaito, then Aoko, exploring the mind-link (go into discomfort and pleasure), lube and probably condoms) but I just can't seem to get myself to write it ^^; I always blush when I write that sort of stuff, too.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 07:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
I'm pretty sure this is a lurker confession--but I read Capture when I was poking around on the DC yaoi community. (Note to self: de-lurk there...) Much hearting ^__^

The one I did was for 30 Kisses. A friend challenged me to write it, and by God, I did it!! It took me over a year, but I did it!!

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 07:57 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Hyakkumensou)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
Mentioned it by name because I thought you might recognize it ^__^ The yuri one, however, was my first and has been friends locked since its posting. (Look up Very Sweet in my memories if you're interested, and then check the month's subjects--I never memorized it because it didn't get any reviews, making me think it was crap ^^; ) Anyway, glad you liked it ♥ Though on re-reading, it could probably use some diologue after all to help pace it better...

Saw it on my 'flist but didn't actually stop to read D: I've been lax in reading DC/MK ficcage recently...

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
Joining this fandom has warped my fragile little mind. Up until I discovered the wonderful world of DC yaoi/yuri/whatever else everyone decides to toss into the salad bowl...would have never dreamed of writing a lemon, nope.

Tempted to try the yaoi thing, but not sure where it would go. Maybe. Someday. Who knows? Which makes me think I should probably de-lurk on the DC yaoi comm and just join already...would make my inner fangirl very happy...

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:08 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Fairy Godmother)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
I had (a small number of) ideas for it, but I never wrote them until the fic in question threatened and I complained to my friend, who told me to go through with it XD And that's how I lost my fanfic virginity!

*shrugs* [livejournal.com profile] manycases1truth takes just about anything, as long as it's labeled. (Srsly, I was egged on into crossposting Capture there.) And I know you would be loved at [livejournal.com profile] dc_yaoi :D

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
I lurked at MC1T for quite a while before I worked up the nerve to post. I really like the community there--good people, good fun. That's part of the reason I like this fandom so much, everyone's so nice!

*squares shoulders* March 2nd. De-lurking at DC Yaoi. Joining. Letting my inner hentai-fangirl go ballistic ^_^

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:29 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Rosie: We can do it!)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
Communities are lots of fun--at least, when they have the right mix of people and stuff.

Alright! Go for it! You shall be welcomed with open arms, I am sure ^__^

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeva-chan.livejournal.com
That's funny. It was Fullmetal Alchemist that did it to me. DC just happened to be the fandom that lasted longer than a year for me, so all the stuff I learned to the FMA!Fandom (which is scary sometimes) bled into DC/MK...

Oooh! I suggest reading [livejournal.com profile] jheen and [livejournal.com profile] clover_magic's LJs if you don't already. They do nice yaoi fics (mostly KaitoShinichi, but yeah. funnness) and might give you an idea or two.

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 07:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeva-chan.livejournal.com
(PROBABLY condoms? Well...considering Kaito's a vampire, yeah...could see how it could be unnecessary and all...hm...)

...and that positioning reminded me a bit of that Roy/Riza/Havoc threesome a friend of mine requested and that I actually wrong...though Riza was sandwiched in between *coughs* >.>;;;

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:00 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Smile)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
(It's mostly that they're never used in fanfics. I'm thinking that yeah, I should (though almost more for Hakuba than Kaito--for all I know Aoko could be on the pill in the fic), but there's a lot I don't know about using them because they're never used in fics. Good for me to stretch my boundaries, though. ...I need an OT3 icon for those three, too.)

*is just way confused by that so just smiles and nods*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeva-chan.livejournal.com
(Ah...makes sense. *nods* Yeah, on yaoi_daily, someone commented on a doujinshi that was posted that condoms aren't very sexy in real life because they're always used and always annoying and troublesome...but in yaoi fiction, they're so rare a commodity that they are like...yeah...teh sex XDDD)

FMA fic...back in April 2005. >.>;; *coughs*

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:11 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Eh?)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
(Really? O_o Never heard of that. Was planning to probably go through with it anyway even if it did mean I'd have to open one of my secret stash and try and figure it out from there. Maybe there's something in The Mechanical Lemon that could help with that...)

I may have to take a look. Not... 'today', though. Possibly tomorrow (in the "Tomorrow starts after I've slept" sense, not the "Tomorrow starts after midnight" sense).

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeva-chan.livejournal.com
(Yeah...actually, I don't even have a secret stash. O_o;;; My sister always had one, but I just never...thought to get a secret stash. Wtf? O_o? But yeah...seeing how it works would be a good idea. >.> And if you know some guys that are willing to give input as to how (un)comfortable it is, you can always ask them.)

Ah yeah...(I should be asleep by now, you know XDDD)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
Rounds are done. I think I'm crashing. But yes, I have the Scotsman song. Happy to share :)

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeva-chan.livejournal.com
Please do~! Link it to a post in my LJ, if you could, sometime tomorrow?

*by the way, Jeva so totally read your lemon fic* :D

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy--chan.livejournal.com
Will get it uploaded somewhere and do so ^_^ And I got the comment--yay!! Will respond...tomorrow, because I just spelled "respond" wrong and tried to type two I's...g'night...zzzzzz...

(no subject)

Date: 2006-02-23 08:28 am (UTC)
soc_puppet: Dreamsheep as Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (Fairy Godmother)
From: [personal profile] soc_puppet
(XD Okay, here's the thing. The only reason I have a secret stash is because I went to dances. Twice. That's it. See, I went to homecoming one year, and a friend of mine there gave me one, and then I went to a GLBT drag dance and this guy and a Red Riding Hood costume tossed a handful on our table. I think I have about four in my drawer. Anyway, yes, seeing how they work would be good. Asking guys is probably out, as most of my male friends are just as dorky as I am, if in different ways.)

Ditto, yo D: *has to get up early tomorrow*

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